When A Cat Meets A Butter Toast

Image via: Uncyclopedia

There are two paradoxical theories in this world suggesting that cats ain't just some cuddly furry huffing animals and butter toasts ain't just delicious breakfast you consume every morning. They might actually be the perfect match in heaven! Wow? Really? So are you trying to tell me that the world is so fucked-up to a degree where ecology system no longer play its role? You ask. Well, to the oxymoron, maybe yes. Here's why.


The law of nature suggests that cats and butter toasts contradicts each other, as in ...

1. Murphy's Law says "If something goes wrong, it will" so, "if you throw a slice of toast with butter into the air, it will always fall with the buttered side down."


2. Cats conservation law says "A cat will always land on its feet"

So, what would happen if we stick a slice of toast with butter to a cat's back and we throw it to the air? The cat, by law, will land on its feet, but the toast, (by law too) will land on the butter's side. Against this problem of physics laws, the nature chooses the best way of taking a solution: the cat may just not fall. The cat will simply spin around its center of gravity at an ever-increasing speed.
If an array of cat-toast are attached in a row, possibly joining their tails together, spinning in the mid-air (like the illustration above), chances are it creates a huge amount of electricity, just like a gigantic generator, strong enough to keep us alive for all eternity. In fact some species alive on planet Earth are already trying out this theory on UFO, hovering vehicles and even hovering trains! O_O|||||||||||||

One thing gets to me though, that millions of cats are gonna be killed as white rats in the process of mad invention. Very soon furry gonna be listed in the Guinness Book of extinction. Now here's the question. Are the laws of nature meant to be used inhumanely for the sake of civilisation? Yea? Maybe the concept of capitalism applies here. Just like slavery. If that's so, Labour Day doesn't seem to bring any real meaning to mankind anyway. Well on this topic, I might have a post later on.

In summary, Edward Murphy is a pessimistic moron. The End.