Thursday, April 30, 2009

Ops, Shitmyx Pandemic Strikes Again!

This time, some innocent sea-creatures are suspects for underwater broken cables! How creative. So rumour has it that Britney Spears was gracefully invited to attend the official marine-based Europe-Asia-Pacific-South-East-Asia-Malaysia relaunch of ShitMac, with the popular opening hits parody of non other than "Ops, they screw it again!". Hotter and harder ever. So I can't help but to charitably promote the hottest ISP in Bolehland that has victimised millions of lives, the greatest civilisation of MSC, since they learned how to wear pants.

"TMnuts Shitmyx - Recently gain 1 spot, from 100th to 99th in the recent 3rd World Country Semi-Broadband survey. Broadband speeds now up to 35Kbps as of 2005. Provide the safest internet service in Malaysia - as long as your PC is NOT connected to the internet, it is relatively safe." -Uncyclopedia Genius on TMnet Streamyx

Now these people are in-charged of international bandwidth.,,,,,
DIRECT LINE: +603-8317 2500

You guys know what this mean.


Please DO NOT call these hotline numbers: 1-800-88-2646 or +603-8317 2500. If you do, these are most likely what you'd get:

Favorite quotes of the Customer Service representative at TMwait Slowmyx / TMnerd Shitmyx *Accompanied by some gay ringtones playing on the other end of the line*

First time calling: "We need three working days to solve this problem." Call after three days: "We need three working days to solve this problem." and continue the process.

We will assign a contracter to your place to look into the matter by tomorrow(in fact a week).

(if u r using external ADSL modem)"Is the light of the ADSL light blinking of off??

Windows XP firewall make your slow koneksion

Please turn your modem upside down and try again

Please unplug your network cable and turn it around and plug it back in" (Witchcraft lah, just stand up and turn around 3 times, your internet will be aaalrite!)

What version of Windows are you using?" (If it ain't WinXP, fuck you! we do not support Mac, Win2k or Linux)

Please unplug your microfilter and plug the modem wire directly into the wall socket" (I can hear the pages flipping, she's either reading Kosmo! or from a frickin' manual, which I can also do, and Fuxx You very much, I already tried, my microfilter is brand new)

You must plug your SATA modem to the IDE floppy disk and put your USB monitor to the 2-socket plug. Then only can you turn on the 30-Amp power to your Acer.

"I tak tahu..." / "Saya don't know..."

Currently, we have no service distruption in malaysia" <--- a good reply when international cable breakdown. Stupid Customer service dont even know.

Nonit talk so much la..... Let me make report for u. U take the report number and keep quiet... Wait for technician to come( if he remembers).. Bye.... tooo..tooo..

Now restart your comp....

uninstall and then reinstall the network driver. That didn't work for you? What you don't have your original disks? No problem, use this web site... what do you mean you have no Internet without the driver? Are you trying to question me?

Please reinstall your modem"(driver)

I am sorry, our support does not cover that. Try calling the company that made your computer or Microsoft. (I have no idea what you are talking about and my script does not cover these sorts of things. Rather than tell you I have no talent, I am instead telling you to go somewhere else and passing the buck to them. Yet I know they also have help desks in Malaysia so I am phoning them ahead to warn them about you. You are so fuxxored.)

Talk talk talk... Please wait while all our staffs are engaged on line...(Stupid tmnut song plays... played over and over hundred of times.. then, line disconnected" - This happened when all the staffs went to minum kopi, lepak, talk cock ...etc watever and refused to answer the phone because they know they can't do anything other than saying "Please wait while our technical workers are currently fixing the problemss

Cannot... cannot" -TMNET customer service on speaking to your supervisor

Tomorrow you come lah... to tmnet center" -TMNET customer service typical panics

An official reply via email from their customer service: "Send email with details can ? We no receive your email at all." Same email recycle until customers give up.

Suh... you made no payments" -on the bill you payed 3 months ago, now they're threating to block your connection

Oh unplug your cable lah, then you squeeze squeeze should be ok adiiiiii!!!

Slow? I think you should upgrade to Slowmyx 1 Meg. How much you are paying now? Just add little bit only ma.

Unplug your telephone line, rub it towards your breast, let the telephone line gets high, then plug back in ur asshole. I'm 100% u can use ur internet to see BOGEL INTERNET.

Huh????Our connection is the fastest among the Asia...u still wan to complain.....our 1kbps speed is faster than a Porches 911...

Most updated reply: "We arr soooooo sori for de inkonveniens cosd". So when can be fixed? " God knows. U can wait u wait lor. Kenot wait, fly to Mexico and die ASAFP lor. The swines are waiting to devour you alive! Nuff said. -_______________________-|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Once Was Lost But Now Am Found

Image via Prayer Pups
The Prodigal Son. Who is? Anybody who wants to control his own future. They leave home saying, “Give me.” And if we're fortunate enough to survive our own best thinking, we come back saying, “Forgive me.” They don't get into trouble until they left their father's house. When you have a restless spirit, nothing keeps you happy, and you run around like a rolling stone singing, “I can't get no satisfaction.” Now here's the point. The only reason there are weeds in your garden instead of roses, is because you don't spend enough time working there.

The prodigal son wanted it before he was ready for it. To know if something's good for you, you need to understand where the desire for it came from. Loving parents don't give their kids things because they cry for 'em, they reward 'em for acting responsibly. They know what's age-appropriate. We all know of good, well-intentioned people whose gifts elevated 'em, only to watch 'em devastated because of some undisciplined area in their lives.

The devil's after more than your possessions. He's after your integrity, your self-esteem, your staying power, your purpose. Prodigal, if you don't make a U-turn, you can actually lose your desire for life itself. Like a slow leak in a tyre, you can be going places, yet be only a few steps from the pig-pen. “How will I know when I'm there?” you ask. Listen, if you wanna know where you are, look beside you. Who do you call? Who calls you most? With whom do you hang out with?Look at the Prodigal. From one of the best families in town, penniless, friendless, eating pig swill. Trying to satisfy a legitimate hunger in an illegitimate way! That's why people get into extra-marital affairs, rip off people, or work ourselves to death, sacrificing our families in the process. Now get this. Will all these actions satisfy you? No!

Finally the penny dropped. He came to himself. If someone stops you in the nick of time, that's the God-sent angel. He'll remind you of who you are and where you belong. You'll start seeing the mud you're wallowing in, the false friends, the empty achievements, the people around you who are no happier than you are. If that's where you are right now, you know it's time to go home. Your father is waiting to wipe your slate clean. The table is spread and your seat's reserved. You haven't gone too far.. yet. Tell yourself, “I've changed my mind,” and go back while you still can.

People change when the circumstances become unbearable. Just don't stay away too long.

note: This day marks the 14th year of my late mom's departure. May your soul rest in the sweet arms of Jesus..always in peace.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Botting Is Finally Legalised In MMORPG!

This is what i promised to share. Good news guys! Do I hear an Amen?

Skeptical but true. Imagine working your ass off 24/7 on 5 jobs, doing house chores, rushing off assignments, following tv drama series, surfing multiple browsers/tabs, checking & replying tons of emails, blogging, cooking, receiving your perverted boyfriends' phone calls, dating, eating dinner, playing MULTIPLE online MMORPGs (haha, sometimes i do) ....and the list goes on.

Life's too precious to waste on just one game that demands your full presence. Especially when you've got to repeat the mass routine duty i mentioned above. Hourly. Daily. Weekly. Periodically. Concurrently you've got a leveling quota to meet and piles of unfinished tasks in the Goddamn quest log. WOw! busy, busy, busy, busy, busy.....

How to keep on leveling without merely dropping a gland of sweat? Say, from dawn till dusk and from dusk till the cock crows thrice the following dawn ..? Like without lifting a finger?


AMEN BROTHER!! *repeat after me*

You shouldn't miss this new concept game called Magic World Online if you're sick and tired getting banned by GM in some shitty-ass games time and over again being caught red-handed. Yes! No fucking GM to ban ya cause ya'll can literally throw shits on their faces and show 'em this new policy! The 1st legal bot MMORPG!

MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! *wicked laugh* oops!

Okay let's get down to business.

The botting features are marvelous! They're so detailed oriented, comparable to your mom (or your maid, you rich bastards!) preparing your sunny side up before you even knock off the side of your bed in the wee hour every morning. Or washing, hanging dry and ironing your underwears without you even notice it. Drawing an allegory here of how the MWO BOT plays an important role by supporting your characters throughout the game play.

BOT menu: Nurse

BOT menu: Setup

BOT menu: Skill

BOT menu: Team

That's too cool for school! Now you may go home and sleep while your characters leveling like mad. XD

Friday, April 17, 2009

You Could Cut Me Up In A Thousand Pieces...And Every Piece Will Say I Love You

Hahax classic line that is!

Here is a real-life-story engraved in one of the world's most famous comic book. The Cross and The Switchblade. Which totally changed my life the moment I touched it. I mean, I'm never a bookworm and stuffs like comics aren't exactly my cup of tea, but this one has captured my heart.

You can download the comic here. PDF format.

It is the true story of a mission that sent David Wilkerson from the tranquil countryside of rural Pennsylvania to the violence of gang warfare in the ghettos of New York. Once there he set about trying to turn the disillusioned youth of the area away from drugs and violence.

Check out the brave man who invented those sweet, heart-wrenching, witty line. Rev. David Wilkerson's the man!

P/S: I'm guilty for not updating this blog for 9857345368325 decades. But here I am right now! Back in ONE piece! YEAH!! XD First of all I'll immigrate some interesting posts from my other hidden treasure site. If ya know what I mean. Then I'll dedicate this blog to stuffs like MMORPGs, games and the sort. So stay tuned. =))